Wishing

 Sometimes I wish time travel really did exist.

If it did, I would go back in time and tell this little girl so many things. I don't know if you recognize her face or not, but there were years where she could have really used someone to come back and tell her that everything works out alright in the end.

She didn't recognize it long ago, but she was a worrier. She liked to know that everything would be solid and definite. No grey. And the future is often one of the greyest things in life.

She only just learned for herself that she liked Jesus. After all, Jesus loves little children and Jesus is good. Why shouldn't she like Jesus? But this little girl didn't understand what it meant to trust him with all of her uncertainties.

five years old

Her life came with many uncertainties and many hardships, and as I think back, I wish I could just tell her that it all works out in the end. I wish I could give her a hug and make all kinds of promises.

But if someone went back and told her all the things she needed to know in the future, how would she learn all the life lessons set out for her? How would she really put into practice and KNOW those lessons? They would lack something.

Often, I wish I could have saved myself from all kinds of hardships. that little girl was me. And some memories cause my heart to break. But having gone through all the flames, I know that God worked all of those difficulties into some incredible lessons and experiences.

nine years old

I wish I could have saved myself. But Jesus did that for me.

He didn't swoop in and give me warnings, no, he did something better.

He gave me hope so that all those hard times don't matter anymore. They don't control me. Nor do they determine anything anymore.

That's been a difficult lesson. After all, I'm a worrier and I crave black and white, crystal clear, security. But over the years, I have learned to let go of that need and practice trusting God to see me through, even if I can't tell, or even make a guess at what will happen.

Letting go is terrifying, let me tell you! But letting go doesn't mean the world will end or fall apart.

twelve years old

After all, if God is good, then he will be good all the time.

No matter what may come my way, I will be okay. I don't have to warn that poor little girl because she learned a lot about Jesus during those hard years... even the ones she would consider changing if given the chance. She might even admit that it was THOSE years she benefited the most.


Hugs,

Emily

In Every Song

I've loved you all along.
The zone that seemed so clear,
the one you dread,
the one you fear,
never held you captive, nor even claimed your hand.
Indeed, I've loved you all along
and heard your name in every song.

I've loved you all along.
And when I laughed so hard I cried,
my heart did break;
I nearly died.
Hoping that one day you'd know...
Indeed, I've loved you all along
and heard your name in every song.

I've loved you all along.
And all along I've sought to earn
your enchanting glance
and tried to learn
every need you've ever had and wanted so much to make you glad.
Indeed, I've loved you all along
and heard your name in every song.


I've loved you all along.
I even feared you'd never see,
the girl right here,
the girl who's me.
Because that zone that seemed so clear, broke my heart.
Nevertheless, indeed, I've loved you all along
and heard your name in every song.

Emily Bergstrom
10/11/2013 

Bookmark

If memory lane and days gone by
are places to be found,
then what if life per se might be
a book of life unbound?

Flipping back are days gone by;
forward are things to come.
But dreams are the ones that matter,
and I'd like to think that I'm your bookmark

Emily Bergstrom
2/7/2013

have you ever considered what your life might look like in terms of a story? Only just recently, I started to. Maybe its because I'm a storyteller and that worldview just comes so naturally. But think about it... consider the turning points in your life and the place you hope to be someday. consider your obstacles and how they have shaped you. That's the way a story works, right?

Regardless of how boring your life might be, you've experienced life. You've met important people. You've had dreams and desires. Well, your life story is the path your take to either achieve that dream, or set it aside and set a new one into motion.

To me, I'm in a bit of awe to know that God already sees those future moments and turning points. He sees if it all works out in the end.

One of my biggest struggles is worrying. I always consider my dreams and all of the things standing my my way. It makes me nervous and panicked... not a happy way to live life, by the way. But when I consider that God is orchestrating a story, and I consider how far he has already brought me, I begin to understand that my dreams are not my own, but His. And if my dreams are his and he has promised to be the giver of good gifts, then can't I trust that my story with end with a "Happily Ever After"? Those are my favorite kind of endings, if you didn't know. Reading books that end with tragedy or death always bothered me. I think its because those kinds of endings are so opposed to what God has in store for us.

So... will you do life with me? Be apart of my story? Be one of my bookmarks, those pages that I turn back to and reread over and over again because they were turning points that inspire me to trust that the future with be just as promising?

what if life per se might be, a book of life unbound?

Cinderella, Cinderella...

Part of growing up, so I've discovered, means learning so much more about yourself than you could see as a child.

Having left high school behind and started on my second year of college, one of the many things I've discovered, is that I have a bit of a modified Cinderella complex... which I just might have inherited from my dad. Never thought that would happen.

Look up "Cinderella complex" on google and you might see something about unappreciated girls who suddenly come into the spotlight. That's not my point. Being a storyteller myself, I tend to look a little bit deeper into the whole story behind Cinderella.

In the Rogers and Hammerstein version of Cinderella, she sings a song called, "In My Own Little Corner," all about how she wishes her life were different. I've always loved that song.
Most likely due to my own overactive imagination. But also because of succumbing to my own version of a Cinderella complex.

Someday, I wonder just how this might effect a marriage (my marriage, ah! the poor man! whoever he may be).

For someone whose love language is doing favors, this creates quite a dilemma. It means that I crave a clean house. I love it when the carpets are vacuumed, the kitchen is swept and mopped and the bathroom sparkling. But I start feeling used when other people begin to sit back and watch me do the work for them. But rather attempting to encourage them to take on the responsibility, I continue doing it myself because I fear they won't perform the task as well as I would. Yet, I grouse and grumble because all the responsibility is on me.

Having written it out... it feels silly. But how many of us really do go about life is such a silly way? For me, its sitting in the same old rut and WISHING something would change. Like one of my favorite scenes between Whitney Houston and Brandy:

Godmother: "Fol-der-ol and fid-dle-dy foodle, all the wishers in the world and dizzy in the noodle."

Cinderella: "That's terrible." 

Godmother: "You try coming up with a rhyme on the spot like that."

Cinderella: "No, no. I mean what you said about dreamers. I mean, why shouldn't I dream?"

Godmother: "I can see this is going to take a while."

Cinderella: "I've always hoped that someone would come and take me away from here."

Godmother: "Cinderella, if you wanna get out of here, you're going to have to do it yourself. The music's in you. Deep down in your soul. When you find it, nothing's going to be able to keep you from walking out that door."

Cinderella: "I've dreamed about leaving so many times."

Godmother: "That's the problem with most people, they dream about what they wanna do instead of really doing it."

I love how stories always speak into our lives. That's the idea for us as writers: to tell a story that resonates with a reader. Now, all the things that make a story resonate are quite involved and take a bit of practice to accomplish (have I gotten there yet? I'm not sure!) but its a goal =)

Well, my prayers for this week revolve around getting rid of my Cinderella complex. But how about you? God likes to use all kinds of different methods of pointing out the ways we need to grow and showing us who we are. Now what we see, however, are we going to trust him to do something about it? There's a real challenge.

Good luck to you!

Emily

(ESV) Phillippians 1:4-6 "I thank my God in all my remembrance of you, 4always in every prayer of mine for you all making my prayer with joy, 5because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now. 6And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ"