Christian Hypocrites

You can't go on facebook or anything of the like without running into rampant posts about surfacing accusations of Christian celebrities. I'll get onto idolatry at another time. And to be completely honest, the more articles I read, the more my heart breaks. I read angry comments from other viewers who seem to be loosing their faith in humanity and God right alongside angry Christian defenders who hurl back insults along with the best of them. Some even outright deny the accusations.

To be honest, I can't deny what's happened, some have issued statements confirming the accusation. I wish I could say these people perfectly model the Christian life - but they don't. But I never put much stock in modeling my life after other Christians. The best statement I've ever heard is, "follow me as I follow Christ." And that's the real heart of Christianity and discipleship, even as we encourage one another, we should never look to people as our examples, rather, Christ is the only perfect executer of all that is good - love, grace, justice, peace.

All that leads me to my real point.

While the Christian world mourns it's fallen figure-heads, I think we need to step back from our idolatry and remember that we're all sinners under grace.

And you may or may not know this, but the Church ISN'T A MUSEUM FOR SAINTS. In fact, if we were to try and build one, not one Christian would completely measure up to the standard. In reality, the whole reason we need Christ, is the fact that we aren't perfect. And needing God isn't a one time thing that happens when you accept his gift of grace. I ALWAYS NEED GOD. There's never a moment where I can do life on my own. I'm utterly dependent on him.

If it were just me, I would say and do whatever came to mind. Life would revolve around my happiness - forget taking the time to help the people around me.

Confession: When I forget to read my Bible, when I forget to pray or listen in church - if I hide away and get wrapped up in my own needs and wants - sin gets ahold of my life.

And to be honest - it's embarrassing.

By taking on the title of "Christian," I feel an enormous pressure to live up to the name of Christ. So when sin has a foothold in my life, the only response I have is to hide. To put on a good face, to look "right."

And let's face facts, I can imagine that's pretty similar to the Josh Duggar case.

It's a big lump of shame, hiding and pretending.

But don't we all do that in our own way?

That's life when we forget to depend on Christ for our strength. Our own strength just isn't enough.

So church, let's turn our attention away from these other Christians, and take a good look at our own spiritual lives. Because they are accountable before God, NOT US. And they should never have been your heroes of the faith in the first place. They're just human.

Because Church is a hospital for sinners, not a museum for saints. We're all a little broken.

But isn't that the whole reason Christ came?

Don't forget to put your trust and reliance on God today.

Swedish Bröllop: Celebrate Heirtage

I love History... I really do. 

And it's not because I like dates and facts. In and of themselves, dates and facts don't have anything of value to offer. But when paired with events, people, memories, traditions... history has quite a bit to offer. 

Something that has meaning and relevance. 

When was the last time you really gave any thought to your heritage? Where your family came from?

I'm often amazed at how much influence heritage exerts. Not just in time honored tradition, but something in the DNA. I can't say exactly what. Or maybe it's patterns... the things we share with children that are passed on from generation to generation. 

But that's a conversation for another day. 

This train of thought began while I was watching an episode of TLC's "Four Weddings. 

Just for quick reference, the basic gist of the show is a competition between four brides who attend one another's weddings and vote to decide best dress, best ceremony, best reception and overall score. The winner gets a luxury honeymoon. 

But anyways...

On the particular episode I was watching, a young lady marrying a Swede happened to be apart of the competition and she made a comment about wanting to include bits of her husband's heritage. This intrigued me, so I got comfortable on the couch and waited for her turn at the alter.

Let's just say, he wore funny clothes, they misused a Dala Horse and the "frog dance" is just another version of the chicken dance.

I was incredibly disappointed.

Let me begin by saying that my family left Sweden 100 years ago and I know more about Swedish wedding traditions than this poor couple... and the groom was born there.

So, to encourage you to pursue learning about your own heritage, I wold like to... no, love to... share some of what is so special about Swedish weddings, or "bröllop."

So here goes.

4 Swedish Wedding Traditions

1. The Coins in the Shoes

 Before a Swedish bride takes a walk down the isle, she receives a gift from her parents. And it's not old, nor new, not borrowed or blue. Actually, she gets money. Sort of. While not worth anything significant, like a dowry, the bride is given a gold coin for her right shoe from her father, and a silver coin for the left from her mother so that she will, "never go without." 

 2. A Crown of Myrtle Leaves

Recently, flower crowns have become all the rage in American weddings, but Swedish brides have been wearing them for years. Most traditions would have it that the bride wears white to show her virginity, but in Sweden, it's the flower crown (sometimes replaced with a real traditional crown). 

3. Three Wedding Rings

 Well men, fork over the cash, because Swedish brides get not two, but THREE rings. The first is her engagement ring, but on her wedding day, she receives two more: one for marriage and the other for motherhood.  

 4. Shouting Vows

Normally someone in any pair has the louder, more dominant personality. But in a Swedish wedding, the couple competes to wear the pants in the relationship. There are typically two ways this one goes: One... whoever says, "I do!" the loudest, or two... whoever crosses the threshold of the church first during the recessional. I'll let you decide which you prefer. 

Diamond of the Rockies Series (Kristen Heitzmann)

 I really do love Historical Fiction.

So its on this note, that I'm sharing one of my favorite series (though I do have a few).

If I have to narrow down what makes a book meaningful, enjoyable, and worth reading two dozen times (my record is about 15 times) I would say two things:

Historical accuracy and prose.

Kristen Heitzmann is well known for her Italian characters and suspense novels, but she has put out a few historicals, and her Diamond of the Rockies series is on my top ten list.

That's a hard list to make.

 To be on my top ten, a book has to be a really, REALLY good read. I have standards, you know!

But as I mentioned before, I have a short list of qualities, and my goodness, this series is beautiful - and words can be beautiful.

Just to start, in my own writing, I use this series as a standard. No exaggeration.  Someone once told me that the trick to writing a good historical fiction novel, is recognizing the fact that you're telling a story, not writing a history book. That said, if a historical anecdote is not relevant to the story, it's not necessary.

As a writer, it's SO easy to get sucked down endless holes and lost down rabbit trails of research. One little detail will lead to another so fascinating, it's difficult to resist putting on the page, whether relevant or not. But that's not even half the struggle. The real struggle is finding the perfect way to set the scene - blending foreign concepts into the story without confusing the reader.

 For this reason, I truly admire Heitzmann's style. The way she sets the scene - describing the Sonoma, California of the 1880s as well as the mining town of Crystal Colorado. The cities come alive without sounding unreal. They have a certain grit to them, like you're standing in the world of antiques - but come alive.

I can't exactly put words to it, but something that bothers me about Hollywood and novels, is the unrealistic nature of their settings. the places and scenes feel more fictional and corny than a place and time in history.

Heitzmann brings a bygone era to life, putting texture and taste to history - and I do mean taste. My mouth waters when I read about Carina's cooking. There is nothing quite like a word picture of Italian food.

Even the characters fit into this old world - their language, their clothing, mannerisms, values - it all feels so real. You can't impress modern values on a historical character. Heitzmann however, takes historical values and makes them relevant to the reader. And isn't that the point of history?

But I said I had two things on my short list - here's the second.

Prose...

Now, let me begin by saying that not all of my favorite books are poetic, metaphoric, and full of symbolism - I don't think that's always the best approach. Instead, Heitzmann enters into her characters and brings their unique perspective onto the page.

Carina Maria Degratia is Italian - a passionate spitfire - small, yet full of emotion. She speaks with her hands, pulls, her heart makes deep, poetic connections to those around her.  

Quillan Shepard is a loner. He's the strong, silent type with a rogue's smile. While extremely protective of every emotion he experiences, he has the heart of a poet, and can memorize entire books upon reading them. 

These two characters come through very strongly whenever they are featured as the POV character. Carina's passion and compassion are almost heartbreaking - moving - as a reader. You heart will bleed. While I LOVE reading Quillan's poignant wording. Like an artist, his thoughts paint word pictures. It's not flowery prose for the sake of it - it's the characters' unique perspectives. And it's beautiful.

On another note, if you are thinking about looking into the series, I would say that even for a Christian novel, consider the fact that the books follow a married couple and the more intimate side of their relationship is discussed (though not shown). Show discretion. I read them for the first time in High School. Make your own judgement.

Still, the moral values in this story are incredibly strong. Interestingly... Carina is Catholic, while her husband's journey is much more protestant. Still, the differences between Catholic theology and Protestant are not strongly emphasized. Carina crosses herself on multiple occasions and seeks advice from the local Father Antoine. Her favorite expression is "Madonna mia!" But much of the salvation content comes from Quillan's conversations with protestant preachers and a close friend. But as a whole, marital fidelity, even in the face of extreme hardship is a core and central theme. Other themes include forgiveness, trust and justice.

This series really is one one my favorites. I hope you'll give it a chance.

"Driven by hope and vengeance, Carina Maria DiGratia leaves her idyllic home in Sonoma, California, for a new life in the mining town of Crystal, Colorado. Though the town has a rough element, Carina is determined that it is the place her dreams will come true. Early on, two men vie for her trust, but neither is what he seems. Will Carina discern the truth in time to prevent tragedy?"

Click here to find in on Amazon (the first book is free on kindle!)
Click here to find in on Christian Book
Click here to find it on Good Reads

Through Waters Deep (Sarah Sundin)

My first year attending the Mount Hermon Christian Writers' Conference, I met another writer of Historical Fiction - Sarah Sundin. Interestingly enough, that same year, she received, "Writer of the Year" for her book, "A Distant Melody."

I picked up that book, figuring it had to be good if she was awarded for it, and it quickly became one of my favorites. I've been purchasing her novels ever since and I've yet to read a book of hers I didn't like.

"Through Waters Deep" arrived in my mailbox about a week ago. And honestly, I didn't know what to expect - Sarah Sundin's previous books were very well written, historical romance, taking place predominantly in Europe with the characters' primary involvement in the Air Force, be it the pilots of B-17's or flight nurses. This novel, ventures into new waters (see what I did there?).

Here's the BCC:

War is coming. Can love carry them through the rough waters that lie ahead? 

It is 1941 and America teeters on the brink of war. Handsome and outgoing naval officer Ensign Jim Avery escorts British convoys across the North Atlantic in a brand-new destroyer, the USS Atwood. On shore, Jim encounters Mary Stirling, a childhood friend who is now an astute and beautiful Boston Navy Yard secretary.  

When evidence of sabotage on the Atwood is discovered, Jim and Mary must work together to uncover the culprit. A bewildering maze of suspects emerges, and Mary is dismayed to find that even someone close to her is under suspicion. With the increasing pressure, Jim and Mary find that many new challenges--and dangers--await them.

See what I mean? Still WWII, but now we're pre-war, home-front, Navy, and not just historical romance... but a mystery. Very Nancy Drew.

But while different... I LOVED EVERY MINUTE.

Sarah Sundin does not disappoint.

I haven't read a mystery novel since I was in elementary school, but my goodness, the ah-ha moment - you'll appreciate it. And the very sweet, budding romance between Mary and Jim was adorable. I think every young woman who's ever felt mousey will instantly love Mary. And Jim - he's wonderful in an out-of-step sort of way. The characters are perfectly endearing and you'll be rooting for them the whole way.

But I have to say... Sarah Sundin is a master of "will-they-or-won't-they." I was on the edge of my seat for several hours, frustrated (in the best sort of way) and worried for the characters as they press forward, facing challenges that only with God's strength and courage can they overcome.

Looking forward to #2 in the Waves of Freedom series

Click here to find it on Amazon
Click here to find it on Christian Books
Click here to find it on GoodReads

You Can't Be A "Good Christian."

As Christians, we are told, "let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven." (Matthew 5:16 ESV)

We are also told, "let your manner of life be worthy of the gospel of Christ, so that whether I come and see you or am absent, I may hear of you that you are standing firm in one spirit, with one mind striving side by side for the faith of the gospel." (Philippians 1:27 ESV)

A life of integrity. 

Glorify God with your life. Be pure of Heart and mind. Modest and kind. Humble. 

Humble... Yup. 

I want to tell you a story... A story about a joyful little girl who grew up in the ministry. A PK (pastor's kid). Some people hear that backstory and immediately respond, "Aw... what a perfect life to grow up in - good influences, good family, good atmosphere. Talk about training up a child in the way they should go!" While others cringe. 

Either way, this little, joyful girl loved being a PK. She loved everything about church. It was fun and the people were nice. Everyone knew and loved her. 

But it was easy when she was little. 

Everyone expects little children to misbehave sometimes. It was allowed. 

But something changed as she grew older. 

Having grown up in church, she knew a lot of scripture. She only wore modest clothing. She didn't cuss. And she only watched family-friendly movies, and of course, only listened to Christian music. 

She was glorifying God with her life. 

Hmm... all the right ingredients. Right?

But oh! What a burden. The whole world was a stage, and she knew her lines. Whether or not the world was watching, she felt eyes on her. And slowly but surely, she became afraid of making a mistake. She had to be perfect. She had to be a good pastor's kid. She had to be an example. Glorify God... right?

Then it happened... 

She messed up. One mistake... then two... maybe three. Thank goodness, no one saw. The facade wasn't broken. No one knew. But in that moment of failure... she felt the weight and the fear of someday, letting down God. What would happen if she failed to glorify him with her life? Was she still a Christian if she couldn't uphold the statutes of a Christian life?

No... that would make her a failure. 

Failures couldn't represent the Gospel. Failures were sinners... and sinners weren't Christians, they were separate. 

The little girl was terrified. 

So... She put on a smile and tried to keep up her God-glorifying life... but this time, she carried around a small, little train of thought... would she mess up in public? Would they call her a hypocrite?

The fear was crippling at times. No longer was it just about her Christian life... but everything else too. Anything new was frightening... what if she failed... trying something new? She couldn't fail! Not in front of others. 

But you want to know something?

It's impossible to be perfect. 

And most people have failed at something... even something they're good at. How could anyone even relate to perfect if no one has ever managed it? Perfection is impossible to find. Not in ourselves... and certainly not in others. 

Yet we hold ourselves to this standard... why?

I think it's because we are VERY aware of God's holiness. So we try and wash ourselves clean, hoping that he'll find us acceptable. That others will look at our lives and say, "I want to be like that," and join us in our impossible quest. 

But even if we got within a hairsbreadth of perfect, it still wouldn't be enough. 

it's not enough. We're not good enough. 

You're not good enough. And you never will be. 

No amount of seclusion from the world and its idols. No wardrobe of modest clothing or itunes library of Christian music will ever suffice. ITS NOT GOOD ENOUGH. 

Jesus is good enough. His perfect, PERFECT blood is enough. 

So, dear Christian, why do you keep trying to add to what Jesus has already purified?

With Him... and ONLY WITH HIM. Are you good enough to be in God's presence. 

When God looks at you, He sees His beloved son, and His grace and love abounds to us. 

This is not to say we should go on sinning, "Are we to continue in sin that grace may abound? 2 By no means! How can we who died to sin still live in it? 3 Do you not know that all of us who have been baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? 4 We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life." (Romans 6:1-4 ESV). 

Sin is like poison. It's no good to you - and certainly no good for anyone else. It's that selfish, instant-gratification, that's leads to temporary pleasure. The only lasting pleasure and joy to be found is in Christ. 

BUT. It's impossible to live a life that glorifies God on your own. In fact, if you were to live a holy life on your own strength... that wouldn't bring God any glory at all. 

You know what does bring God glory?

When the most unlikely, broken, sinner of sinners does impossible things. Of course a "good person" (if there is such a thing) will do good deeds. But when a "bad person" does good things... well that's a miracle. Only through God is such a thing possible. 

He's in the business of loving the ones who don't deserve it and using them for His glory. 

Rahab - a prostitute - is in the family line of Jesus

King David - an adulterer and murderer - (also in the family line of Jesus) is remember as a Man after God's own heart

Joseph (techicolor coat guy) - was prideful and arrogant - but he saved his family from famine

Mary - pregnant teenager - was picked to raise God's own son. 

Paul - Christian killer - became one the the most well known missionaries of the early church. 

God likes to use the least likely of people for his work. 

So don't for a minute think your failures could ever separate you from the love of God. 

For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, 39 nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38-39 ESV

Something I've realized... You don't have to clean yourself up before you approach God's throne. Jesus has to do that for you. 

Remember that scene in "Voyage of the Dawn Treader?" That CS Lewis book. (Comes after the Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, and Prince Caspian). That one. Anywho. The Pevensies' cousin, Eustace Clarence Scrubb (and he almost deserved the name) is turned into a dragon while on "Dragon Island" and after he grows tired of being one, he tries to shredd the scales from his body. But layer after layer, he can't dig deep enough. So Aslan (the great lion) intervenes. His claws go deep. A thick layer is peeled back, bearing the boy clean and returned to his human state (and a better version, might I add). 

It is only with God's intervention that we can live lives that honor him. And you know what? The fact that you're not perfect? It's relatable. People understand weakness. It's the common plight. 

And believe it or not... God's power is made perfect in our weakness. 

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. (2 Corinthians 12:9 ESV)

So stop trying to uphold God's perfection on your own two shoulders. That doesn't bring him any glory. Sinners upholding God's standards? That's just downright awesome. Sometimes they stumble, sometimes they fall, but Jesus picks them right back up again, dusts them off, and says, "I still love you. You still have worth to me." 

And isn't that just amazing?

I'm not sufficient in and of myself, but with God? He's all-sufficient. I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength (Philippians 4:13). 

I Don't Think Courting Means What You Think It Means

At our house, Saturday is chore day.

But I'm one of those people who conducts dialogues with myself while I'm cleaning - history, writing, movies... I ponder it all. And today's topic is Historical Courting.

Not courting.

Historical Courting.

Because, as I'd like to point out, there's a difference between what a lot of folks would like to call courting and the idea from which it originated.

Something I've begun to notice from many Christians who are discouraged with the world we live in today, is a desire to return to bygone days - the "It was better back then" mentality. But the past is subjective to its own circumstances. Humanity doesn't change, just it's circumstances. They had murderers back then too.

Likewise, the idea of courtship is vastly dependent on the participating culture aa well as the era.

But to keep things simple, I'd like to point something out (I'm using a mid-late 1800s example).

Did you know that the word, "Chaperone," DID NOT refer to someone who followed you on your date? Chaperone was actually more commonly used in place of the words escort, date, or companion for the evening.

Yes, I did say date. As is the male love-interest.

Think of it in this context. No matter what, as a girl, it's good to take precaution when you go out. If you're by yourself, don't walk into dark alleys, and best case scenario, take a friend with you.

Same concept.

If you're going to a party, you go with a date right? Your date is responsible for taking care of your for the duration of the evening and returning you home. This could be a brother, a male friend or another male family member.

In the movie, "Meet Me In St. Louis," Esther Smith (Judy Garland) is escorted to the Christmas Eve Dance by her grandfather. Her sister Rose (Lucille Bremer) is escorted by their brother. However, both girls meet up with their beaus at the dance, who bring them home at the end of the evening.

But here's what I really want to get at.

You've all read L.I. Wilder's Little House books, right? And I don't mean, "seen the TV show." That TV show is horribly inaccurate. So don't use it as a source of knowledge for the books.

The second to last book, These Happy Golden Years was written about the time during which Laura and her husband were dating (the mid 1880s - they married in 1885). This is the Victorian Era, if you were curious - the days of bustle dresses (my personal favorite).

So anyways... I've heard a lot about some more modern concepts of courtship, but it doesn't exactly match these idealized days of dating. In fact, it was more reminiscent of something my dad once said to me when I was in junior high.

He told me that if a guy wanted to date me, there was a written test and an interview.

I laughed.

But really... If you HAVEN'T read Laura's books, I would like to share some details.

• Laura met Almanzo officially when he offered her a ride home from school (though she did run into him shortly after moving to their homestead in De Smet)
• Almanzo was 10 years older than Laura and her father's friend.
• Almanzo would drive Laura home each week from the school she taught at because he was better able to than her father. 
• Most of their "dates" were what Laura called their, "Sunday Drives." She and Almanzo would go on long buggy rides after church. 
• Some of their dates were in groups, such as buggy rides with Ida, Mary and Cap, or the period of time during which they attended "singing school." 
• Almanzo did ask Pa's permission to marry Laura before proposing. 
• Laura's and Almanzo's first kiss was upon their engagement. 
• Laura was 18 and Almanzo was 28 when they married.

Anyways... while I was throwing around these ideas, you can see where a lot of modern courtship ideas come from, such as the waiting to kiss and asking her father's permission to marry her. However, I would also wager that their "courtship" also looks an awful lot like modern dating, as well.

Actually, I would say that this Historical Courtship looks more like common sense.

Remember what I said about the written test and the interview? Honestly, I think that more stems from the idea that your parents ought to have met your date. Think about it... Almanzo was a trusted friend of Laura's family. When he began asking Laura to go on rides with him, Ma and Pa trusted him to take care of their daughter. But it's more similar to that age old idea of your date coming inside to sit with your father while he's waiting for your to come downstairs. Dad asks a few questions, says something about the shotgun he owns and what time to have you home.

You know, the more I think about it, even when girls aren't living at home anymore, they tend to talk a lot about the men they're seeing with friends. Advice and insight from friends can be incredibly valuable. The same can be said for dear old dad's impressions.

So, if your escort/date presents himself as a nice guy, then I think, as long as you avoid alleyways, closets and dark rooms, he can to trusted to chaperone you when you go somewhere. To keep you safe from miscreants who might try to steal your purse.

But even Laura went on group dates. Friends make good company. They can help judge character and encourage everyone to keep their hands to themselves (aka PDA).

Something interesting about the way Laura and Almanzo starting dating, though... It's hard to tell at first. There are no declared intentions, just a gradual increase in awareness of one another. Almanzo begins changing their outings to specifically reflect Laura's preferences.

This is most certainly not to suggest that These Happy Golden Years ought to be the model for every relationship. I certainly would like to marry someone a LITTLE closer in age than 10 years. But I think the book certainly offers a good perspective on what dating used to look like.

And what it DOESN'T look like, is our modern courtship.

It's a new day. A new era. A different time. And our definitions are affected by our own culture, just as their was affected by the conditions of the 1880s in South Dakota.

So please, don't use the, "it was better back then," line unless you really know what it was like then. Because modern courtship is NOT a revival of historical values. It's a response to our own time and culture.

#petpeeves #historymajor

"Heroic"

Tom Welling (CW's Smallville)

Earlier today, I read a post on facebook about Heroism.

The only problem is - I think we're beginning to forget the basic idea of how to join the "hero" industry. It's easy to throw around the word "hero" when you've deleted the defining factors from memory.

I'm sure you remember in school, someone likely asked you, "Who's your hero?" But they may have easily exchanged the word, "hero," for, "idol."

Who is your idol? The person you've put on a pedestal? Who can do no wrong in your eyes? Who you emulate? Strive to be like?

Who is your hero? The person you saved you at some point? Who put themselves are risk for your sake? Who practices self-sacrifice and bravery?

A hero is personal. An idol is not. Heroism requires connection. Action. Intentionality. But above all: it requires Humility.

Stephen Amell (CW's Arrow)

You see, there are many things we can do in life that come with a certain measure of ease. It's apart of our makeup. What makes you YOU. Your gifts, talents and abilities. But how do you put that abilities to use? It it because it gives you a certain amount of satisfaction and joy? But what about other people?

What about when your grandma cooks dinner, or bakes cookies? She loves to cook, but you benefited from her cooking, correct?

I'm going to challenge you with something:

She's still not a hero. Not yet.

Not yet.

You see, even though she put her talents and abilities to work for your pleasure, she hasn't sacrificed anything but her pocketbook and an hour or so of time.

Heroism is costly.

It's sacrifice - and not only sacrifice but self-sacrifice. It's selfless, not selfish.

Grant Gustin (CW's The Flash)

Heroism is NOT ABOUT THE HERO. Not his personal agenda, not his pride. Heroism is about THE PERSON SAVED.

Gory is merely a side effect.

You see - in every Super Hero story you will ever see/hear/read - the Hero never self-labels.

The hero isn't the first person to call themselves a hero.

And in every story, becoming a hero is always to their own risk.

Think about it - sacrificing normalcy, facing mortality, rejection.

Becoming a hero really isn't to their own benefit. But the hero realizes something - People need heroes. So they set aside their reservations and fears to do incredible things for the people around them. And more often than not, they keep it a secret. It's not about getting personal glory.

Do you realize how gifted you are? You have a gift. Of some kind. But how to you plan to use it?

How do you plan to use your life?

Is your life about you? About your own happiness, wants and safety? Because, dare I say it, you're no hero.

Melissa Benoist (CBS's Supergirl)

Do you know know is a hero? Look around you.

Think of someone who makes sacrifices.

Think of someone who stood out when the rest of us cowered.

Someone who is selfless.

Who isn't about their own happiness, but about the happiness of others?

Because guess what? The best kind of happiness, is when your actions bring joy to another.

Happiness is community.

Because selfish people come in two varieties - putting others in danger, and therefore, becoming villians. And then, there are the isolationists. And neither leads to happiness.

So let's hold fast to heroism.

The next time someone asks you, "Who's your hero?" Don't tell them who your idol is. I'd be willing to be your idol likes the attention. But your hero? They probably don't even know they are one.

When I was a freshman in high school, I did something rather stupid. I'm sure we all have stories. I told one of the girls in my PE class to participate (she was texting in the middle of a volleyball game). Bad idea.

She sent her friends after me. They stalked me, pulled my hair. Bullied me. I needed a hero.

I was terrified. (You try feeling brave after someone pulls your hair).

So I found a friend. She stayed with me. Walked me out of the locker room. Kept close.

She didn't have to. She even told me she happened to be friends with the girl I offended. But nevertheless, she played the part of a hero.

And you remember that example I made out of grandma? Funny thing about grandmas - a lot of the ones I know are widows. Life can be hard without other people around you. But I can't begin to tell you how many widows I know who have the biggest hearts. Who put their limited resources on the line to make others happy. That's a hero.

Who's your hero?

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On the topic of heroes. I just want to say - I found out the other day that Dean Cain and Helen Slater are joining the Supergirl team. You can't begin to know how happy that makes me. 

If you ask me who my favorite Super hero is, I'll say superman every time - because the superman community tends to be fairly amazing and close knit. Since the CW's Smallville, staring Tom Welling as Superman, previous stars have started making cameos, such as the infamous Christopher Reeve (Clark Kent) and Margo Kidder (Lois Lane), Annette O'Toole (Lana Lang), Dean Cain (Clark Kent), Teri Hatcher (Lois Lane), and Helen Slater (Kara/Supergirl). 

So now, you can understand why I'm so excited to see CBS carrying on the tradition of cameos with the 90's superman and the 80's supergirl. 

By the way - Dean Cain was apart of a show called, "Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman." If you're curious, it really was well constructed. I loved it. However, it definitely places more of an emphasis on the relationship between Lois and Clark, not on the action (traditional to superhero shows).